


HBO or Showtime?

by Huntress69



Series: Role Play [3]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: (Mild) Kink (Translation: Rough Sex and Light B&D - but nothing to flee from), A Side Of Crack, Established Relationship, Humor, M/M, role play
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-25
Updated: 2013-04-25
Packaged: 2017-12-09 07:32:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/771646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Huntress69/pseuds/Huntress69
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny gets a service call from the cable man, but first he has to speak with a cable rep</p>
            </blockquote>





	HBO or Showtime?

**Author's Note:**

> 1) Two fics in one: The first is Crack!Fic - _Danny VS The Cable Company_ ; the second is _The Cable Guy_.  
>  2) Written because Steve wanted to top and Danny wanted to play innocent.  
> 3) I used to work for a major cable company and I so wish I could have spoken to my customers as my fictional rep does; if I had I would have been fired on the spot. The basic scenarios however, were things I was often asked. Oh, and it's just a coincidence (snickers) that the rep shares my name.

**Disclaimer: I want them, I need them, but they need each other more. And if I owned them, I'd be getting the most thorough fucking of my life, not writing this fic.**

**_ 1\. DANNY VS THE CABLE COMPANY _ **

"Damn cable box!" Danny was totally frustrated. 

Two hours playing with the wires and he still didn't have a picture. 

He studied the diagrams, convinced that everything he did was proper, but all he got on the screen was a message that read, **NO SIGNAL - PLEASE CALL YOUR CABLE COMPANY**.

Finally conceding defeat, he called them, pushing 1, 2, 7...he followed all the prompts and somebody finally picked up, and then hung up. Danny called back, waited on hold for 20 minutes before he got a person, found out he had the wrong department, was placed on hold numerous times, and was transferred to three different people before he finally got **Cable Repair**.

_"Hawaii Cable, this is Karen, how can I help you?"_

"I picked up a new cable box and...."

_"Just a moment; I have to put you on hold."_

Danny grumbled to himself as he heard the godawful muzac.

_"I'm back. Are you still there?"_

"Yes."

_"Too bad, I was hoping to take a break. But since you're still there, lucky me, I'll need to verify your name, address and phone number before I can do anything."_

Danny gave her the information.

_"Okay, now that we've established who you are, or who you claim to be, what do you want?"_

"I got a new cable box today and I don't have a picture."

_"Of course you don't, sir. If you did you wouldn't be calling and I could finish my crossword puzzle. Let me ask you, is the box plugged in?"_

"Yes, it's plugged in."

 _"Just making sure. Now here's what you're going to do...."_ She walked him through the steps to connect it.

"I still don't have a picture," he told her.

_"Did you screw in the cables like I told you?"_

"Yes, I did."

_"Check them again; I'm sure you did something wrong."_

Danny looked them over. "Everything is fine."

 _"Well then, it should work,"_ she sighed. 

"Well it doesn't!" Danny snapped.

 _"Fine."_ She clearly yawned at the other end of the phone. _"Check the different inputs. **Aux1, HDMI, Component, TV, Cable** \- did you get a picture yet?"_

"What was the one after HDMI?"

_"Never mind; I'll get you an appointment with a technician."_

"Can't you just send some kind of signal to boot it up?"

_"What kind of signal do you want? We have **Refresh, Hit, Warm Reset,** or **Initialize**."_

"How the fuck should I know?"

_"Sir, I'll have to ask you to watch your language or I will terminate this call. Do you **want** me to do that?"_

Danny had spent 40 minutes trying to get the right department. "NO, DON'T HANG UP!"

_"Only if you're nice and treat me with respect. I'm a person, too, you know."_

"I will, I promise."

There were a few minutes of silence.

"Are you still there?" Danny asked quietly, thinking she'd hung up on him.

_"Yes sir, I am here, much to my chagrin, although I'd rather be at a bar drinking. Would you care for meaningless conversation or can I continue to the calendar to get you an appointment?"_

"Just do it."

_"By 'it' do you mean go to a bar, spout some words that are probably above your IQ or get you a tech so you can get a picture on your screen since you apparently can't do it yourself?"_

"Everyone's a smartass," Danny muttered. "Just get somebody."

_"Thank you, sir, for allowing me to do my worthless job at my almost minimum wage salary and give you satisfaction. Please hold."_

"NO, DON'T PUT ME ON...." Danny was listening to muzac again.

After five minutes she came back on the line. _"I can have a technician out there in two days."_

Danny got huffy. "I'm a cop!"

 _"I'm thrilled,"_ she replied snidely, _"but that doesn't mean jack to me. We're booked."_

"I am **required** to watch the news every day due to my job!"

The woman fired back with, _"And I'm required to watch Court TV to avoid getting arrested. You still don't get a tech for two days, so deal."_

"I NEED MY TV!"

_"Stop shouting at me or I will send so many signals to your box it won't work until 2017! I'll have to ask you to hold again to give you a moment to calm down."_

Danny was tempted to throw his phone as the muzac came back.

After another few minutes she returned. _"I have nothing for two days. Have you tried reading a book lately? Maybe sit outside and get some fresh air instead of staring at the television? Ala Moana is lovely this week; the waves are very relaxing to look at."_

"Okay, you, listen up and listen good," Danny snarled. "I am a member of 5-0, also known as the Governor's Task Force. You get somebody out here in the next hour or I'm gonna bust your ass for...something."

 _"5-0?"_ Her voice perked up. _"I'm honored; I've seen you on TV, catching criminals."_

"Yes, 5-0." Danny smiled to himself, convinced that would get him a quick service call.

_"Are you the tall and dreamy one with the awesome tats that used to be in the Navy?"_

"No."

_"Are you the one I saw riding up to a crime scene on a Harley?"_

"No."

_"Can I assume you're not the cool chick either?"_

"No, I'm not." Danny wanted to reach into the phone and strangle her.

 _"Oh,"_ she grunted. _"Then you're the short one who always wears those stupid ties."_

"I'M NOT SHORT!"

_"But your ties **are** stupid."_

"I'M GOING TO HAVE YOUR JOB!"

_"Does this mean I get yours?"_

"WHAT?!"

 _"I suppose you're also going to tell me that not only does a camera put 10 pounds on you, it also takes away from your height."_ She snickered. _"And I saw you on the news the other night with a tie that looked like you threw up on it."_

"I WANT A SUPERVISOR!"

_"I'm sorry, they're all in a meeting, and if you want a call back there's a four hour window, during which time they may call you back. Or they may not."_

Danny heard her talking to somebody. "HELLO!"

_"Can you fix tickets?"_

"Are you insane?!"

 _"I work here, don't I?"_ She paused again. _"I'll get you a tech today and you fix all my tickets. Deal?"_

"All right," Danny agreed. "Whatever gets my cable repaired today."

_"Can you really do it? Because if you can't and are just humoring me, I will see to it you never have cable service again. Don't forget, I **know** where you live."_

"Yes, I can; I know people."

_"Then I'll get one of **our** people out there soon."_

"What time?"

_"Soon, and if that's not good enough, you'll wait the two days."_

Danny didn't reply.

 _"Wise choice, sir, in not answering me. Have a lovely day and thank you for choosing Hawaii Cable. Next time call back after seven, because that's when I get off."_ She hung up.

Danny took a deep breath and sat down, staring at the door, willing the cable technician to show up soon.

**~~~~~~~~**

**_ 2\. THE CABLE GUY _ **

At 7 o'clock there was finally a knock at Danny's door and he glanced up. "Thank you, God!" He opened it, ready to take out his frustrations on the tech, but found himself staring at one of the prettiest faces he had ever seen.

"Uh," the man looked at his work order, "Mister Williams? I'm Steve McGarrett from the cable company. I understand you needed a service call?"

Danny quickly nodded, unable to take his eyes off the guy.

Steve ignored the look, his stance totally professional. "And you need your cable repaired?"

"Uh, yes, please."

"Not a problem." Steve walked in and spared a glance at the cable convertor. He knelt down and fiddled with the wiring. "What did you do to the poor cable box?"

"I installed it, or tried to," Danny explained. "When I picked it up today the girl in the place said even a child could do it."

"Then we need to get a child." Steve unhooked two of the wires. "You've got the in and out wires mixed up." He redid them and turned on the box. "See, now you have a picture." Steve checked a few of the channels. **_TNT, USA, History,_** " Steve scanned up, "everything seems to be working now." He stopped scanning. "For some reason your **_HBO_** and **_Showtime_** aren't coming in though."

"I can't afford those," Danny groused. "Twenty bucks a month for a few movies is way out of my budget."

Steve licked his lips, blatantly checking Danny out. "I can get them for you." 

"You mean an illegal set-up?" Danny narrowed his eyes. "I'm a cop."

"And your point is?" Steve unhooked his tool belt and let it drop to the floor. He took a step towards Danny, who stepped back. Two more steps from each and Danny was backed against the wall. "I'll give them both to you for a kiss."

Danny felt the breath on his face and swallowed hard.

Steve pressed his palms to the wall on either side of Danny's head. "I'll give you **_Cinemax_** also if you let me touch you." He pressed his body forward, feeling the hardness in Danny's jeans. "Just one kiss." He didn't wait for a reply, or permission, he just pressed his mouth over Danny's, licking at Danny's lips until he was able to slide his tongue in. His hands found their way to Danny's back and up his shirt. "You are delicious." He moaned as he felt the bare flesh beneath his fingertips. "Let me have you; I'll even throw in **_Starz_** and **_Encore_**."

Danny stared into the blue-gray eyes and his brain short-circuited; Steve's voice could melt butter in a blizzard. "I've never...never...."

"You've never been with a man before." Steve purred in his ear, tonguing the lobe. "That's okay; I'll go easy on you."

Danny mumbled something under his breath.

Steve blinked and pulled his hands back as if he had been burned. "Excuse me?"

"I said," Danny looked all around the room, taking a few breaths before he met Steve's eyes and spoke again, "I've never been with **anyone**."

"I find that difficult to believe." Steve got himself together and placed a finger on Danny's cheek, stroking down to his neck, feeling Danny shiver. "Why would anybody not want you?"

Danny looked himself over. "I'm short."

Steve unbuttoned Danny's shirt and ran his palm down Danny's chest. "Athletic."

Danny stared at his upper body. "I'm pale."

Steve undid Danny's belt, sliding it from the loops. "Like a fair-haired virgin."

Danny stared at Steve as if he was crazy. "Have you ever looked in your mirror?"

Steve didn't understand the question. "Every day when I shave."

"You probably have women **and** men begging to go out with you and you have an interest in **me**?"

"You're cute," Steve replied, trying to keep a straight face. "And yeah, they beg at my feet. But sometimes they leave crumbs on the table, which upsets me. Or they track mud on the floor and I have to break the mood to mop. And they get upset when I do their laundry during the night."

"You do their laundry during the night?" Danny had to force himself not to giggle.

"It was just one time," Steve flushed pink, "and she was pissed off."

"What possessed you to do her laundry?"

"There were sweat-stains on her shirt and they bothered me."

"You're anal."

"That too." Steve agreed. "There was one guy who was a total slob. He left crumbs all over my house, a trail of them as a matter of fact, plus he **and** his daughter left muddy shoeprints in my kitchen and a pile of filthy clothing in my living room."

"What happened to him?" Danny asked tongue-in-cheek.

"I got rid of him. Not only was he short and pale, but his hair had a life of its own." Steve framed Danny's face in his palms. "You have beautiful eyes." He leaned down for a kiss, but Danny ducked his head.

Danny had to force his voice to work. "Uh, will my DVD player work?" 

"Hooking up a piece of equipment that does not belong to the cable company is an extra charge." Steve looked unsure. "Are you going to pay it?"

"Yes, I will." Danny held up a disc. "We'll see if it works when you're done."

Steve did some more work and took the disc, placing it in the player. "Just switch the input to watch DVD's."

"What do you know? It works." Danny stared at the screen. "The picture is crisp and clear."

Steve's eyes grew wide. "That's...that's...."

"Two guys." Danny smirked. "Yeah, I watch gay porn."

"Holy shit." Steve's mouth dropped open as he watched. "The angle of the shots is..." he did a doubletake, "...perfect."

Danny sat down. "I guess whoever made it knew how each guy would look on film and planned it all out."

"Planned it all out?" Steve's voice went up an octave.

"Yeah, you know, set up a couple of cameras in a certain direction, made sure that things went the way he wanted them to so he **would** get those perfect shots." Danny studied the film. "It probably took the cameraman a good couple of weeks to edit the film to make it just right."

"And he did an amazing job." Steve tilted his head as he watched. "The brunette, he looks like he gives good head."

"I wouldn't know," Danny said shyly. "I've never had it done to me."

"And the blond is obviously enjoying himself, and...." Steve's head snapped up. "Did you just say what I think you said?"

"I told you, I've never done it."

"I thought that was just sex."

"I've never done anything." Danny shrugged his shoulders. "I'm a poor cop, I don't have time to meet people, and I can't afford to go out, so it's just me and my right hand."

"That's a real shame." Steve brought one leg over Danny's, placed his knees on each side of his body, sitting in his lap. "A guy like you deserves more than his own right hand." Danny opened his mouth to respond but was quickly silenced by Steve's tongue dueling with his. "You're a terrific kisser, Mister Williams."

"Call me Danny." Danny's breathing grew heavier. "If you're going to excavate my tonsils, you need to call me by my first name."

"Danny." Steve moaned his name and slid to the floor, kneeling between Danny's legs. "I'm Steve and I am very happy to meet you." He undid Danny's jeans, urging Danny to lift up so he could pull them off. "Commando?"

"I hate underwear; it's so constricting." He focused back on the TV. "Ooh, look, the blond appears to be getting a bit possessive; he's grabbing the brunette by the hair and forcing his mouth down. I think he likes the way the bigger guy is sucking him off."

Steve's head whipped around, taking in the on-screen action. "How's the volume on the film?"

"Uh, it doesn't have any," Danny half-laughed. "The guy that made it must have screwed something up when he was editing."

"Then we'll just have to make our own volume, won't we?" Steve wrapped his fist around Danny's hardness. "You have a huge cock." His tongue darted out and quickly licked the tip. "Can I suck it?"

"I-I...." Danny stammered, gave up on answering verbally and just nodded. 

Steve licked up the length. "You're going to love this." He placed his hands on Danny's hips, opened his mouth and took Danny's entire cock down his throat.

"JESUSFUCKINGCHRIST!"

Steve reached up and twisted his nipples, making Danny yelp. "Don't blaspheme," he teased, and lowered his head upon the length again. He hooked his arms under Danny's legs and pulled him to the floor, purposely grazing his teeth along Danny's sensitized flesh.

Danny grabbed Steve by the hair and took control, lifting Steve's head up and down in the rhythm he enjoyed best, but his hands were batted away.

Steve came up for air. "We do this my way," he warned, "or we don't do it at all."

Knowing Steve would make him suffer, Danny wisely balled his hands into fists, keeping them at his sides.

"Better." Steve returned to his blow-job, sending Danny's head into the clouds. He knew he was good at this - Danny had told him often enough. His head was bobbing up and down and he was making the most obscene slurping noises.

"OH FUCK!"

Steve's head rose. "We'll get there eventually." He bent his head a bit, lifting one of Danny's legs over his shoulder so his mouth could reach Danny's balls. He sucked on each one, feeling every shudder in Danny's body, and then allowed the leg to drop, returning to Danny's cock. He sucked hard on the head, he blew on the tip, he jerked Danny fast and slow.

"I'M GONNA COME!"

"Not yet you're not." Steve moved back, resting on his knees. "It's getting kind of hot in here." He pulled his shirt off and stood, his khakis and underwear dropping together, kicking them aside. 

Danny crawled over to him, took Steve by the hips and leaned forward.

Steve grabbed him by the hair and yanked his head away. "No."

"I can do it, I know I can." Danny was begging. "I want to; why won't you let me?"

"I have other plans for you," Steve held him in place, "and they don't include this."

Danny glanced up at him with a look that was a cross between demure and debauched. "Please, only for a minute; I just want to taste it." His bright blue eyes had darkened considerably, like they always did when he wanted something in the bedroom.

Steve had never known anyone whose eyes actually did that, and he could never refuse his lover anything when that look was directed at him - and Danny knew it. "All right," he agreed, "but make it good." Steve gave Danny some latitude in movement, softly sighing as Danny's mouth slid down.

Danny hummed around Steve's cock; he knew all too well how much Steve loved that. He was more that aware that if he used his tongue and teeth together, it drove Steve wild. His mouth was warm and wet, and over time Danny had learned the right amount of suction to use, the perfect level of pressure, to make Steve come.

"ENOUGH!" Steve bellowed, tearing Danny's mouth away. 

"More?" Danny asked, sounding more like Oliver Twist asking for gruel. 

Steve had to fight the 'yes' that wanted to fall from his lips; he wanted to drag Danny's mouth back to his swollen cock and make Danny suck him until he spilled down Danny's throat, forcing him to swallow every drop of come Steve could give him. "I said no." Steve shifted behind him and dropped down, kissing Danny's nape, his hands massaging Danny's arms. "Relax for me." He pulled Danny's arms behind his back and used the belt to bind his wrists. 

Danny was suddenly aware of what was happening. "What are you doing?"

"Putting you at my mercy." Steve shoved him forward, Danny's ass in the air. "I think you need a spanking." He raised his hand, ready to bring it down.

"No," Danny clearly objected, "please don't."

Steve's hand froze mid-smack, suddenly unsure if they were still playing a game. "Danno?"

Danny turned his head, knowing what Steve was thinking, gave him a smile and blew him a kiss.

Steve squeezed the right cheek. "You're a cop." He brought his hand up and swung it down hard, grabbing the cheek and digging his nails in. "And you wanted illegal cable." He slapped the other cheek, watching the spot grow pink.

"I changed my mind about this." Danny tried to crawl away, but his soft moan let Steve know all was well; he was enjoying himself. 

"You're not going anywhere." Steve grabbed him by the shoulder and held him still; the sight of Danny bound turned him on something fierce. "You're supposed to uphold the law." The next blow was harder, Steve's own cock throbbing at the handprint he left. "But you were going to break it." He brought his palm down again, gritting his teeth - his hand was stinging. "You need to be punished." One more slap and Steve had to clench his hand; it hurt now.

"I never knew I could feel like this," Danny murmured.

Steve knelt over Danny's body, whispering in his ear. "How does it feel? Tell me."

"Sweet pain," Danny gasped out. "I need it as badly as you did."

Steve kissed his way down Danny's back. "I'm going to give you what you need, Danny, that and so much more." He bit Danny's ass, leaving a mark, soothing with his tongue while he undid the belt. 

With his arms free, Danny placed his palms against the floor and raised his ass higher in the air. "Do it," he growled, knowing what Steve had in mind. "I want you to."

Steve folded the belt in his hand. "We do this, Danno, and there's no turning back." He wasn't playing their game for the moment; this was going beyond the limitations they had set when they decided to role play. "You need to be sure." 

"I want my fucking **HBO**!" Danny snapped.

That was all the answer Steve needed; the sound of the leather smacking against Danny's skin reverberated in the silence of the room. 

"It's illegal," Steve pointed out. "I could get into trouble for even offering it."

"I don't give a damn."

The belt cracked across both of Danny's cheeks. 

"Your creamy white ass is getting all red." Steve's cock was getting harder than he thought possible and he brought the belt down with a resounding smack, rubbing the taut muscles of Danny's ass with his hand; he definitely had an inner-sadist, because he could have come from this alone.

And Danny sure as shit had an inner-masochist, because he cried out "AGAIN!" as Steve struck him. 

Steve caressed Danny's ass with the leather before he slapped him with it yet again. He was ready to go for another when he saw small welts begin to form on Danny's ass. "No more."

"I want...." Danny begged again. "I need...."

"No, that's enough," Steve reiterated, tossing the belt aside. "The adrenaline rush is addictive, isn't it?" 

"Oh God yes." Danny nearly collapsed to the floor; only Steve's arm around him kept him on his knees.

Steve pulled back a bit and kissed and licked each and every welt on Danny's bruised ass. "So, Mister Williams," he massaged Danny's ass as he got back into 'character', "which premium channels do you want?"

"All of them," Danny moaned.

"For that, I'm popping your cherry." Steve held Danny while his free hand picked up the lube. He smeared some on his fingers, teasing Danny's hole. "Are you going to give it to me?"

"No," Danny groaned out, pulling forward; Steve pulled him back. 

"Wrong answer." Steve slid one finger inside. "We at Hawaii Cable are known for providing good customer service." More lube, then two fingers; Steve was being gentle. "I'm going to make you beg for my cock."

"I won't beg for this." Danny was trying his best to still himself, to make his body refuse, but his hips wouldn't stop moving.

Danny was loose enough for Steve to get three fingers inside; he was fully open to Steve now. "I have always prided myself in giving my clients excellent...satisfaction."

"Please...." Danny whimpered.

"Please what?" Steve kept his voice just above a whisper. "Please yes or please no?"

"Whatever you want, it's yours." Danny let his inhibitions go, squeezing his muscles tight.

"Damn straight its mine." Steve removed his fingers and slicked his cock; he was done with the game. "Just like you've always been." He held Danny open. "I let myself forget that you were my property." He watched as his cock was swallowed by Danny's hole. "And I think you forgot it also." He rammed in, burying himself, so tempted to lay a few more smacks upon Danny's reddened ass. Steve pounded hard, taking back what was his and his alone; he had completely forgotten what it was like to top and remembered how much he enjoyed it. He was almost brutal as he thrust deeper, Danny's moans urging him on. Steve began to shift to his haunches and took Danny up with him. 

Danny had never been in this position before and the sensation was anything but pleasure. "It hurts." He tried to pull off, but Steve grabbed him around the waist and held him there.

"Shh, the pain will go away, I promise." Taking Danny's cock in his hand, Steve felt it softening; he was more than aware of how difficult this particular position could be. If Danny really couldn't take it, Steve would stop, but he needed this moment - they both did. "Take it easy, Danno," Steve crooned in his ear. "It's just me; it's just Steve, who loves you so very much." He placed kisses on each of Danny's shoulders, nibbling the nape of his neck. "You are so beautiful like this, sitting on my cock, your ass stretched so I can fill you." Danny's cock was slowly swelling in his fist. "That's it, Danny, stop fighting me." Steve felt Danny's body relaxing. "Let yourself enjoy it; let me take you to Heaven."

Danny's head fell back upon Steve's shoulder. "Talk to me some more." 

"And tell you what?" Steve undulated his hips, stroking Danny slow and easy. "That you've made my life wonderful?" He brought his other hand up and teased a nipple, rolling it in his fingers. "That I can't imagine not having you by my side?" Danny was hard in his hand again and Steve jerked him a little faster. "You complete me, Danno; without you I am nothing."

Those words did it for Danny, who shot his load with a soft sigh of "Steve" from his lips.

Not so for Steve, who bit his shoulder and screamed "DANNY!" as he came, the orgasm so intense his vision blurred. "Oh God, Danny...oh my fucking God."

"Yeah," Danny gasped out, "ditto." He began to lift up, but Steve stopped him.

"Let me." Steve took extra care as he lifted Danny from his cock, turning him so they were facing. "You okay?"

"Never better." Danny rested his forehead against Steve's. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For loving me so much."

"Likewise." Steve rubbed his cheek against Danny's. 

"You're not only a kinky bastard," Danny couldn't help the slight laugh, "but you're a romantic." 

"Only with you, Danno."

"And here I thought you were pretty vanilla."

"I am, mostly," Steve's cheeks turned pink, "but sometimes even vanilla needs a topping and some whipped cream."

"Do you have a food kink I should know about?" Danny teased, drawing Steve's lips to his.

"I'll let you know." Steve kissed him, keeping it chaste while he caught his own breath. "I love you, Detective Williams."

"I love you more, Commander McGarrett." Danny shifted a bit, wincing from the slight pain.

"Easy there, tiger." Steve reclined against the sofa and lay Danny astride his body, caressing his ass, trying to alleviate the pain. "You're coming down from that adrenaline rush and now you'll feel the aftermath." He lowered his eyes. "I'm sorry I hurt you."

"I wanted you to do it, Steve, you know I did, or you would have stopped. I didn't have to say a word; you would have known." Danny cupped his chin and lifted his face up. "You were right, the rush is fucking amazing and no, you didn't hurt me, not in the way you think. It was, as you once put it, a good kind of pain." He gave Steve a shameless leer. "And I have never forgotten that I belong to you."

"Do you want me to put anything on it?" Steve was a little concerned. "First aid cream or something?"

"I'm okay, I swear." Danny kissed him again. "Steve, that slob with the daughter, the one you told me about that made your house a wreck?" 

"Yeah, what about him?" 

"When you mentioned him, you sounded kind of...mushy."

"He brought out a side of me that had been lost for a long time." Steve couldn't help his shy smile. "I was sort of hoping he'd give up his apartment and move in with me, make my house a real home."

"Did you ever ask him?" Danny raised his lips for another kiss. "I love kissing you."

"I thought he'd say no, and I love your kisses, too." Steve kissed Danny deeply and when he pulled back his cheeks were red. "He says he likes his personal space."

"And we go from past to present tense and that adorable blush returns." Danny straddled Steve and laced their hands together. "Why don't you try asking him?"

"Move in with me, Danno? Please?" Steve looked like a little kid. "I'll let you leave crumbs anywhere you want."

Danny's cock was coming back to life; he was prepared for another round. "Even in bed?"

"Especially in bed." Steve lazily slid one finger up and down the length. "I'll even permit you to tie me up and spank me every Saturday."

"Permit?" Danny eyed him skeptically. "I don't need your permission for that." He placed his finger to Steve's lips as Steve opened his mouth. "You'd never say no to me, would you?" He lowered his lashes and pouted. 

"No," Steve replied with a breathy sigh. "Never."

"And I get to blindfold you on Wednesday's."

"If you're a good boy."

"And cover you with whipped cream every other Monday and lick it off."

Steve's cock jumped to attention. "Oh Hell yeah!" 

"I don't know." Danny appeared to be thinking. 

"I'll buy a belt made of softer leather so I can crack it across your ass with harder strokes, leave fewer welts and make you beg for mercy." Steve took Danny's wrists in his hands. "And the thought of you tied up gets me so hot."

"Definitely a kinky bastard," Danny laughed. "But it's still a big step. What else do I get out of it?"

"I have the MLB, NFL, NBA and NHL packages with the cable company, plus every other channel in existence."

Danny eyed him warily. "You won't change the channel when the Yankees or Jets come on?"

"Nope, Scout's honor."

"Then how could I turn down an offer like that?" 

"Good, then it's settled." 

"Steve, what took you so long to get here? I was waiting almost four hours."

"I had to finish **your** report on the Kingsley kidnapping and get it to the Governor." Steve slid his body a little lower, grabbed a pillow and propped his head up, and pulled Danny further up his body. "Now, can I please suck your cock again?"

"By all means." Danny rested his cock against Steve's lips, Steve opened his mouth...and Danny's phone rang.

"I swear, Danny, I don't care if the island is being attacked by Martians, I am **not** leaving this spot."

Danny answered his phone. "Hello." Pause. "Yeah, well...." Pause. "Okay, if you insist." He hung up.

"Who was that?"

"The building manager." Danny smirked. "It seems that the neighbors were complaining again about the shrieks from my apartment and if I keep it up I'm going to be evicted."

"Your shrieks or mine?" Steve was cracking up, but then calmed down, his mouth reaching for Danny's cock again. "We'll make them suffer one last time."

There was a knock at the door.

"Go shoot whoever's at the door," Steve told him, exasperated. "I'll swear it was an accident."

Danny put on his pants and opened it, finding two police officers standing there.

"I'm Officer Bender and this is Officer Fry," one said, "and I am sorry but we've been asked to tell you to please keep things down. And being this is the third complaint we've received, we're going to have to write you a citation."

Fry just rolled his eyes and took the ticket pad from Bender. "Don't even bother; it's a waste of time." 

"But we are required to write the citation," Bender insisted, peering inside and glaring at Steve, who was casually lying on the floor, the sheet partially covering his body, his head resting in his palm, looking like a total innocent. "In fact, we're supposed to write one for both of them."

"You want to be the one to tell the Captain we wrote tickets to 5-0?"

"5-0?"

"Meet Danny Williams and Steve McGarrett." Fry smiled at Danny. "Why don't you just move in with Steve and put us all out of our misery? His house is secluded and you could scream to your heart's content and nobody would notice." He glanced over at Steve. "Well?"

"Already done, Fry," Steve explained. "He's moving tomorrow."

"I can't do that," Danny said, shaking his head. "It's too soon. We have to get a van, get my things packed up...."

"Danny," Steve looked amused, "I've had a van on hold for a few months now and half the HPD is prepared to help."

"And if we do," Fry happily nodded, "we get free barbecue and all the Longboards we can drink."

"Yes you do, so go away and come back around noon." Steve waved his hand as if shooing him off. 

Danny eyed the clock. "Noon?"

"Make it two," Steve sighed. "And see Kono's cousin Kamekona about the van."

"Good night," Danny said thoughtfully and closed the door. "A van on hold?" He removed his pants while Steve folded the bed out.

"Yes, dearest Danno, and it's been costing me 200 bucks a month to make sure it would stay available." The two lay down. "By the way, Kono's girlfriend told me she never had so much fun talking to a customer, she wishes she could talk to all her customer's like that, and she apologized for whatever she said about your tie; she really liked it. And also, did you agree to fix **all** of her tickets?"

"Yeah," Danny nodded, resting his head against Steve's shoulder, "I could tell she was having a good time."

"Did you ask Karen how many tickets she had?"

"No; why?"

"Have fun trying to get 17 violations taken off her record."

"Seventeen?" Danny paled. "That's going to cost me every favor I'm owed by the HPD; I'm going to end up owing favors."

"You should have thought about that before you said yes." Steve smirked. "And if you don't fix them all, she's shutting off my cable, in which case you and your right hand **will** be best friends." He started the DVD again. "It's a shame this doesn't have any sound."

"I lied." Danny pulled Steve's hand to his mouth, kissing his palm.

"About what?" Steve asked, his breath hitching as Danny sucked on his thumb and moaned. "Damn, Danny, I could come from that alone."

Danny brushed his lips over Steve's. "I know, baby, why do you think I do it?" The kiss was rough, teeth and tongues mashing together. "You are so fucking hot; like a damn furnace."

"I could say the same about you, and what exactly did you lie about?"

"The volume on the film; it works just fine."

"Good." Steve forced his body to move and got out of bed. He rearranged some wires, hooking up the DVD player to the stereo speakers. "How about as we go to sleep we give your neighbors an aural show they'll remember forever?" Steve returned to bed and burrowed into the heat of Danny's body, closing his eyes.

**_"SUCK ME YOU COCKSLUT!"_ **

"Or we could just watch TV." Steve opened his eyes. "You know, I could definitely get off on watching that brunette; he's quite talented."

"Nah," Danny shook his head, "the blond's got him beat by a mile."

Steve watched for a few more minutes. "I think you may be right, Danno, and who am I to argue?" 

The two snuggled close and went to sleep to the sounds of their own moans, grunts and all-around filth, happily ignoring the phone that began to ring.

**FIN**


End file.
